but I am still finding it *really* difficult to do anything that I can't hide if need be (like get my ears pierced, which I have always wanted to do).
Oh just do it already. Lots of men have pierced ears and you can take the earings out after a while you know. I'ts not exactly like having breast implants now is it? It's your life, live it.
The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs. We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.