@Natalie: from past posts, it didn't seem you were in DADT, in the sense that you had discussions about the dressing with your wife, a closet for Natalie's wardrobe in the house, etc.
Has something changed? Or are you calling it DADT because she doesn't want to see you dressed?
Also you mentioned photos. So it seems your wife saw you dressed, just not in the flesh. Have you discussed with her the shock it may have caused to her? That kind of toothpaste that never goes back in the tube.
Are you leaving evidences around by mistake, or to trigger a reaction from her?
Is what you call a DADT request from your wife the result of a discussion about boundaries? Did you tell her that you want to dress to the full nines, want to go out, etc.?
I may be wrong, but you seem to be dressing every time your wife is out for some duration, you are also going out, all this means taking more and more risks, more evidences left in view, or even be caught by a wife who doesn't want a part in it, a neighbor telling her, etc. I can't see how that spiraling can end well.
