I never considered myself gay. I've always been analytical (i.e. a nerd) so I had no trouble separating sexual attraction from gender.
But then I realized I was gay. If I'm a woman attracted to women, then I am ipso facto gay.
Then the walls of social prejudice fell apart, and I found sexual attraction to be much more complex that labels like gay and straight. The labels became unimportant.
Where am I today? As a man, we probably could apply the label hetero to me. Certainly I have absolutely no interest in a man as a man. A man-man relationship has no value to me.
But I do find that as previously noted, I very much love man-woman relationships (hetero) woman-woman relationships (gay). But there is one more quadrant available here. That is the woman-man relationship. And that is a relationship I have also learned to enjoy. Note that I find relating to a man as a woman is quite different than relating to a man as a man. I consider relating to a man as a woman to be hetero, not gay, but I'm sure others who think that the physical defines sexual relationships would argue otherwise.
The point is that being transgendered destroyed the very meaning of 'gay' to me. It does not have any meaning when one changes gender.
Marla
