Quote Originally Posted by Mrs. G View Post
Reine,
Thank you for being a support for my SO. I have been very hesitant to reply because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I am afraid to cause anyone harm by my words, the old saying "sticks and stones" is one I no longer believe, I know words hurt.

To answer a few of your questions, yes a small part of my problem is my personal religious and moral beliefs. However a much bigger part is the repeated feeling of being deceived and lied too. I can say tonight is the first time my SO has decided to be honest, to the point of telling me the truth whether or not it hurts me to hear it. Through our whole marriage and dating life his has been half honest with me, but only after discovering many truths my self and he felt forced to do so. I hate to think of the kinda of person I have become, I have compromised myself, time and time again in the hopes of being able to save our marriage. I feel that in some ways there is no more of myself left to compromise. Sierra has worried so much about my feelings that he has hidden part of himself and lied to try and save our marriage as well, however it seems that even with both of our efforts the wedge between us gets bigger and bigger.

Today's breaking point comes again from feeling deceived. I had been looking for places to post my minimums so I could join FAB, while looking I ran across some other posts from my SO. I guess I should have known better than to let my curiosity get a hold on me. I found out that he has thought about HRT and said he would even consider an Orchiectomy. I guess in some ways I felt as if I had been sucker punched once again. While dealing with the idea my SO likes to CD, I am now confronted my the knowledge that it may not be enough for him that he may indeed want to become a girl full time. When asked previously he had told me he didn't think he could do those things that he indeed like being a man. Now that I have confronted him again about what he wants his future to look like, he says he is unsure. When I asked him why he couldn't tell me these things when I asked him, he didn't know that either.

I LOVE my husband very much, and I am truly scared for him. I must be honest I am scared for myslef and my daughters as well. We have a counseling appointment next Wednesday. I continue to pray for healing to be brought to our marriage, for me to be able to trust him again, and for us to find a place of peace for both of us, I just worry that the only peace we may find may not be together and that thought terrifies me.

I wish I could write more but fear with emotions running so high I may be rambling about things. I would love to talk more, I'm just o sure what to say except thank you again.

~Mrs. G
hi glad u joined and even posted your side , im not taking either side , but i do want to ask some things and maybe u can think about them first,

first off would your husband love u any less if u had to have a mastectimy for any reason. why do u call a some one who loves to dress up as a girl gay, plenty of actors dress and where makup r they homosexual. where do u go to escape when u need a break , there are alot of cders that cd to escape there lives for a little while. the more u read up on it the more info u know ,

marriage is more that i want u to do this and if u dont then this will happen , i agree that u shouldnt be lied to and that truths are scary to come to relizations with , u know have u two even set boundryies cding is like a disease to some sort u cant fully get rid of it there may be a long drought but it eventually comes back , now being a christian myself , there are stuff in the bible that talks about many things with marriag and with eunichs and such and about forgiveness and how often
be well read before u swing that sword , one verse or another out of contexts can be devistating when used the wrong way . before u even mention the d word u do your home work find out how others have delt with this and see if theres something that works for u , just cause feelings get hurt dont mean u should be using that word as a lever to get your way , heck u havent even had a good couseling (from what i have read)to hash it out to even come close to a compremise , yes i said compremise , theres kids involved plus what would outing him do to them at such impresionable ages, the one thing i really would like u to do first if u would , is take the time to sit down and watch the movie FIre pROOF together. it will get the ball rolling if u want it ill send it to u free of charge