I get it we lied to our SOs. . . but please

[Tina_gm]

My point exactly. Most don't get it and most can't see the others pov it is either "my way or the highway" approach. Every person has the right to make their own decisions "right or wrong" and nobody has the right to tell them otherwise. Provide advice, provide support and so forth but don't judge. That's all I am asking.

Isha

Isha, I think most do get it more than you think. We communicate our thoughts on any matter, but some may not agree with yours or someone elses who agrees with you. They are merely thoughts and opinions. My opinion on this manner is formed by personal experience with my wife, the vast majority of GG's who are SO's and are members here, and of the struggles people have on here when they come out to their wives or GF's after a commitment was formed.

I have actually told my wife many of the "reasons" why I didn't tell her in the beginning. Guess what, it doesn't make the pain she has any less. Yes, she can understand why. She can perhaps feel some sort of relief that I had no master plan to throw her such a wicked curve 3 and a half years into the relationship, 6 months into marriage. But she STILL has to change gears and traverse a path in life she was not expecting or prepared to do. If I had told her, then she would never have had to have done that, and would have been prepared for this different route in life, a path most do not take.

Your title of your thread basically is set up to rationalize what most of us know is wrong. Wrong because lying and or any other way of deceiving our committed partners is simply wrong, regardless of what it is we lie or deceive about. CDing does not get a special pass in my opinion.