Originally Posted by ChelseaAnn
My advice, if you want a GG perspective. You two are stuck being co-parents forever, so it's wise to try to stay on good terms. (Also wise not to have another kid together.) You're financially dependent on living together right now, which also means it's wise to try to stay on good terms. And in any case, you are putting off your transition until the legal situation with your job changes.
I would try to build a friendly roommate situation with your wife. Remind her that you are a woman. You're sorry for the disruption this creates for her, but it's unavoidable, just as if you had been diagnosed with a serious disease or been in a serious accident. When you're not at work, you will dress as a woman. If she's not attracted to women, then your romantic/sexual relationship is over. But that doesn't mean you can't be friendly roommates and co-parents.
Encourage her to date other people, and remind her that you will also be dating other people. Assuming that part of your relationship is over, you'll each need to start taking care of those needs with other people. And keep going to therapy -- you will still have issues as long as you're putting off your transition. I think it will be wiser for you to understand that your professional choices are behind your delayed transition. Your co-parent is not the roadblock.
