Why should lesbian, gay or bisexual people have come out as a group? I mean look - most of us don't have sex in public, so why isn't that just like CDing, mostly done in the privacy of your own home? I mean, there were all these married people who weren't straight, but were in straight relationships - coming out screwed up some of their lives. They risked employment over this too. They risked loss of standing in their community. Some of them lost their lives over who they were.

Wouldn't they have been FAR better off if they'd stayed in the closet? I mean do people REALLY need to know your sexual orientation? (Unless you are straight - everyone wants to know about your wife, kids, etc.)

After all, what could 3 or 4 out of a hundred people who loved someone of the same gender do to change people's opinions about homosexuality. Seems like a hopeless task to me! I mean, there is NO POSSIBLE WAY people are going to accept gay people as friends, not ostracize them from families. They'll NEVER be a TV show showing them in a positive light. I mean, it's not like they're ever going to be allowed to be married, or anything...

So yeah, I guess y'all are right. The plight of CDs is hopeless. You are better off, as a group, staying closeted. There's just no chance for improving your lot in life, of society accepting, even a little bit, who you are. I mean, look at the gays...

I'm not denigrating any of you for not coming out. Your lives are obviously yours to live, your decisions about them yours alone to make. My only point is that if you are unhappy with the limitations on your lives as CDs, YOU are the only ones who can change them. No, it will not be easy. Yes, you'll likely face consequences initially. But I guess I have to say that the fundamental reason people don't come out is this - fear. Often times the fears you have are justified. However, I think it's not much of a life to live driven by fear. It's your choice to make - but I'm simply suggesting that you look at what others have done, what they've gained, and think about it.

And this is highly relevant to the thread - staying in the closest is causing CDs to be left behind.

Quote Originally Posted by Veronica27
But you are judging. I have tried to stay out of this conversation, but your comment about male privilege really annoyed me. This terminology has come to be accepted as a universal truth in recent decades, but it is a gross insult to the men I knew growing up in the 40's and 50's. They were hard working men who took their responsibilities seriously. There was nothing privileged about being the sole earner of the family, working 6 days a week, and striving to give an education to your children.
You mean, like the guys who denied promotions to my mother, a single mom, giving them instead to a much less qualified man, because (they really told her this) "He really needs the raise - he has a family to support after all." As if my mother didn't. The idea that the man was the sole earner for the family is an example male privilege.

I'm not judging anyone.