Good points AnnaMarie in the absence of information people will make up the missing bits to suit their own feelings and views.
So I would like to hear some HONEST answers from those of you who HAVE told their SO's. A few questions:
1. When you told your SO did you tell them everything the full depths of your feelings? Or did you hold back and perhaps play it down based on their reaction or otherwise?
2. Those in DADT situations what have you done/would you do if your feelings towards your gender change slightly. For example when you told your SO the 100% truth you were a CD who simply liked to wear woman's clothing on occasion. SO accepts but doesn't embrace and you are now in a DADT situation. Fast forward a bit and your feelings start changing and perhaps the urge to dress grows or you start wanting to take the girl further... do you update your DADT SO or keep your feelings to yourself?
