Sophie,
Yes that is it!! Cding is not a cause !! Cding for most ( for me anyways ) is like being born with brown eyes. I didn't ask for for brown but I got em anyways so I live with em,.. The eyes work fine and beat not seeing at all. Yes , sure I could cover or change the color of my eyes to blue with contacts but that just wouldn't be me.
I am just saying that if your wife knew you CD'd from the start and like so many of us do, did you think you were going to stop once you were married? Did you mis lead or guide her in anyway ? Did she understand that for the most part, cding was a part of your life right from the begging? You said she didn't like it from the start and maybe in good faith because you meant well and thought for sure you would stop , but you continued to let her down by doing it. Did you in anyway educate her offer her professinal therapy?
If she ( your wife ) knew what cding was from the begging chances are you would still be together ,but lets not forget most women DON'T!! Now I am not in anyway saying you decieved your wife in anyway you are correct I wasn't there and I didn't live it..I am saying if your wife knew and accepted CDing from the start she would know its not something you can just STOP or change ( like being born with brown eyes ) you cover it up the best you can and hide it..No cding doesn't break up marriages we do..