That was my point, really.Originally Posted by Kaitlyn Michele
Being true to one's nature means going ahead with it to one's best ability, and not just "saying" one is TS.
A lot of people in this forum think that if they need to express their feminine selves and if they don't CD just for the fun of it or just for fetish, then it "must" mean they are TS. We all know there are many, many different points along the line, between fetish crossdresser and level V or level VI TS according to the Benjamin scale. And these points are the end result for many people (like my SO who is dualgender - or bigender if you prefer), and not on the way to "becoming" TS.
I did go back and read some of Lynn's past posts and just a few weeks ago she made a reference to her wife giving her grief about "her cding". It's true that we cannot hold someone foerever to past statements, but really, doesn't it seem as if often people join here initially wanting acceptance from their spouses for the unfettered expression of their feminine selves, yet within a short period of time after joining, they determine they are TS when they discover that they are under major constraints at home? And then they post in this section a lot and with great conviction only to disappear after a while when it comes down to actually making the decision to take concrete steps towards transition, more than taking hormones to get a bit of boobage?
Just saying that Lynn needs to ask herself some important questions about how far she is really prepared to go, and not make the decision that she is TS and telling this to her wife until she has been out and about in the mainstream A LOT for at least a year and has gotten over the excitement of it all. Lynn is young and can pass easily, so this should not be a problem.
I go back to my original point. If Lynn's wife is hearing "I'm TS" then this does mean full transition including the disappearance of any male physical characteristic. At any rate, it is a lot more than just shaving or not shaving legs, wearing or not wearing clothes, and wearing or not wearing a beard. And to go back to an earlier question I asked here, if Lynn and her wife are close and Lynn is really a woman, wouldn't Lynn's wife already have a clue, like Sandra did (sorry Sandra for bringing you in, but you and Nigella are the perfect example :p).
I say this specifically for you Lynn, to help you with obtaining more freedom to dress: two things need to happen. Your wife needs to come to terms with the notion of alternate gender first, and she will not go along with it if within a very short period of time after joining this forum she hears from you that you want to transition (what does this mean, really ... surely it means a lot more than dressing, shaving, and getting breasts). You need to slow down a little with your definitions until you have been out and about in real life a lot and for at least a year. And THEN you can both see where you're at.
And to use Sandra and Nigella's example again, Nigella and Sandra dealt with this for years together before getting where they're at now.
I'm not saying that you are or aren't TS. I'm saying that given your past recent posts and your outlook on the whole thing, you may need to compare your definition of "TS" to Kate's, Kathryn's, Misty's, Rianna's and others who have fully or have completed substantial steps to being on their way to fully transitioning. With a legal name change.
