Attractive, or "Meh - take it or leave it"

[Sara Jessica]

Reine, this is an excellent question.

I couldn't agree more!!!

There was a large group of women ranging from pretty and well dressed to more "plain" and overweight as compared to the others and less attractive by most societal standards. She asked would you still be one of those women versus one of the more attractive ones. We both answered without hesitation, yes. While it would be nice and desirable to be one of the more pretty women, all we wanted was to be a woman. It was not about the appearance but the essence of being a woman even if far from societal measures of beauty and attractiveness.

This is a huge litmus test if one is being honest with themselves about how their own degree of trans. Melissa is wise and you are as well to share this example with everyone.

You are fortunate to find such fulfillment in what looks like a complete socialization as a female. That is worth more than looks any day of the week.

My heart aches for women who would ridicule their own body image. I'd trade for their "flaws" any day of the week, particularly if it came with the opportunity to grow up socialized as a female. To me, that loss is more important than the thought of a forty-something transition. Flawed logic, I suppose. I'm focusing on what I cannot have instead of what the future could hold. Still, I have come to the conclusion that an alternate future as a female when compared with the one I am currently faced with is not all that desirable at this time, partially because of those things I can never experience.

Interesting question. For me it is more about the style rather than the attractiveness. No, I wouldn't want to be the unattractive, overweight frumpy mother in baggy burp stained clothes. The issue I have with that image is the choice of style and lack of effort for their appearance. Everyone can make the best of what they have male or female...So, I wouldn't be the flustered mother, I would want to be the neat, well dressed mother. Attractiveness doesn't come into it for me.

Nicely said Katie. I emphasized the "female" in your discussion and couldn't agree with you more.

Thing is, changing what we were dealt with is not particularly easy. It isn't that one might have a less than ideal body shape or attractiveness when it comes of self-image. Instead, those things are not easily modified and maintained.

It isn't simply about losing weight. There are things when it comes to frame, build, etc. that just cannot be changed. Kind of like in our world how we often struggle against frame, build, height, foot size, hand size, etc. And women are less likely to resort to padding it up or squeezing it down as many in our community are inclined to do in order to meet a perceived ideal.

Regardless, there is something to be said about having a sense of style. It isn't all that time consuming once you get over the learning curve and it can be embraced by anyone. It certainly is noticed when done well!!!