Don't discount yourself, you've raised some interesting questions for me.

Quote Originally Posted by TheMissus View Post
Still, I think she's definitely behaving normally for what can be a very abnormal situation. Though, I do recall she knew all this at the beginning? Not that this stops the swinging back and forth, to be honest. We girls are good at changing how we feel about things depending on the wind! Maybe she's just coming to the realisation that perhaps you're further along the spectrum than either of you realized and she's not comfortable with it?
I probably am further along than she's comfortable with. But there is also that watershed moment where she didn't care that she was getting me arrested while I was dressed up, which led directly to me not caring if I dressed up and she didn't like it. I don't see a lot of people here with that kind of history with their SOs. I feel like I'm breaking new ground. Granted, it's probably new ground that leads to divorce, but when I get militant in a thread about how SOs need to accept their husbands/wives, there's a reason. If it came down to it, would you send him to jail while he's dressed up? Or would you lie and protect him? Which is the more appropriate expression of love? Let's assume he's not abusive, because if he were, send that jackass to jail....

Have you done your own soul-searching? Do you know where this is going?
Yes, and we've talked about it. FFS may be in my future. Likewise, breast augmentation may also. But before either of these, we both have ****ed up teeth, and she wants a kid and I've had a vasectomy. So, priorities.

If you answered 'no' I think this is definitely an issue as women do prefer stability in relationships, even those more accepting of alternative lifestyles as I know your wife to be (you do talk very proudly of her here so I think she'll be pleasantly surprised) So she may feel on shaky ground if you're 'rocking the boat' so to speak with your personal discovery?
I'm really glad you brought this up. I feel like I've offered her a level of stability in a relationship that she's never seen, even with the CDing thrown in from left field. I feel like this stability is so strong that she's taking me for granted, and in other non-CDing related issues, she's just expecting me to pick up the slack. I pointed out to her tonight that in most relationships, when it comes to emotional stability, women usually pick up the slack for men for a year or so, and then the relationships end. I feel like that's what I've been doing our entire relationship, and in the last 4 weeks, I stopped, and our relationship has atrophied to a point where it's hard to say we even have a relationship.

She had no answer to that. Well, she had answers, but they were jabs, like she was trying to win an argument.

For me, right now, finding a woman who's accepting of me being a crossdresser is far less important than finding a woman who will have an actual relationship with me.

And I write this knowing she may see it. But like everything else we've talked about in the last 6 months or so, it's nothing new to her. I wonder what it'll take to get it through her thick skull.