Before this thread gets locked as it appears to be getting off track. I read that statement "I am tired of needing to be a man" quite frequently as a justification to xdress. I have no doubts it helps to relieve stress as I used it as a coping mechanism for many years. I am in agreement with Melissa and April that it is important to be authentic. Incorporating your emotions and mannerisms into your everyday life would go a long way to relieving the distress of not being able to express yourself. I understand many have hidden their proclivity to crossdress from their partners and that is unfortunate. I believe when ever we start getting serious we should disclose to our prospective future mates so they may make the decision to stay or leave.
It took a fall off a roof followed six months later by a sigmoid colon resection to stare at my mortality for the first time in my life. I choose at that time to live my life as I wanted and not what others expected. I started wearing eyeliner, colored nail polish, pierced both ears and wore woman's tee shirts, jeans and shoes in various combinations. My wife was certainly not thrilled , but she was used to me crossdressing as I told her on our third date I had a need to wear woman's clothes.(That was 34 years ago).
it took some time but they eventually got used to the idea especially when they saw most people really didn't care. I didn't want to people to see my femininity at that time so I cut my below shoulder hair short. I was accepted by all I came in contact with. I owned what I was doing and when I was asked I would reply, this is what makes me feel good. But I was authentic and felt that way.
3 years later the inner war I was waging came to a head and I realized I needed to transition. I am full time. My name has been legally changed and I socialize, work and play as a woman. I have not had facial surgery or body modifications other than those resulting from 18 months of hormone therapy. I get gendered both female and male as I am in that awkward beginning stage. I am accepted and get the respect I expect because I own what I am doing. I am not afraid to act emotionally or mannerisms how I am feeling at that time.
I work in a very male dominated industry and I have yet to get dissed for dressing or acting as a female might. I am authentic to the degree I feel I should. I am certainly not male, but I am no princess either. I do the brakes on my company or personal vehicles as needed. I can use a portable chop saw to slice through crap filled rotted cast iron pipe if necessary.
The point is to be yourself and to be authentic. Express yourself however you like and in a way you feel comfortable. if you have not told your partner I do feel for you but you made that predicament yourself. Only by freeing your inner you to the world will you feel liberated and find the happiness you deserve.
